A Woman Who Fears the Lord

Women of God, this is a call to reclaim true biblical womanhood.

Our culture and the enemy have attacked the true definition of a woman and it's infiltrated into our deepest beliefs about who we are and who we desire to be.

In my own fight against cultural Christianity, one BIG thing I have noticed in myself is this:

There are times when I spend more time trying to become more like what I think a godly woman should be than I spend trying to become more like Jesus! 

So I'm not going to attempt to put forth yet another definition of biblical womanhood to add to the myriad of different opinions floating out there. Because there is no one definition for a godly woman. We are all different. We have all been created uniquely for specific purposes and we are not the same. So let's stop trying to make ourselves into what we consider a godly woman and let's just start focusing on becoming more like Jesus. Because the only definition of a godly woman is Jesus.

For me, there are many many godly women whom I look up to, admire, and respect. However, I am not called to be just like them. Jesus has given me (and all of us) a unique mission and if I spend my time working to become more like someone else then I will completely miss it. I want to make sure that my idea of a godly woman comes straight from the bible rather than from my idea of what a godly woman looks like in this culture that we live in.

For example, the Proverbs 31 woman, is seriously way cooler than I ever realized. I mean, ya'll- this woman is LEGIT.

Here are a few awesome things about her:

-She rises while it is yet night and her lamp does not go out at night (she works hard)

-She makes her arms strong (she takes care of her body)

-She considers a field a buys it and then plants a vineyard & she sees that her merchandise is profitable (she is a woman who is not afraid of the business world)

-She is not afraid of snow for her household (She isn't afraid of the hard seasons)

-She can laugh at the days to come (She doesn't worry about the future)

-She reaches out her hand to the poor (She's missions minded)

There's more but I will stop there. So you can see that this woman is incredible. It's almost intimidating really.  How could I ever be all of those things? Well, I felt like that too for a long time, like I have to work to be it all, but I was missing the point and if you feel that way then you are too.

Because here's the thing about the Proverbs 31 woman- she isn't just one type of person. She isn't just  called to missions, she isn't just a great mom or a great wife or a smart businesswoman. She's not just brave or funny or strong. Why? Because a godly woman isn't just one type of woman.

A godly woman is a woman who fears the Lord. She is not required to do and be it all. She is not required to be good at everything she does. She is not required to be the best friend, the best wife, the best mom, or the best daughter. She is not required to be the best anything. She is in love with Jesus is allowing Him to mold her into exactly what He wants her to be and not what the culture is telling her she should be. 

She might be funny or smart or quiet or loud. She might be a mom, or a wife, or a businesswoman or a missionary. She might be one or all of these things but that is not what is most important about her. What is most important is that everything she does is for the glory of God. She spends so much time with Jesus that she radiates His presence to those around her.

A godly woman is not pressured to fit the cultural norm of what a godly woman looks like. She might not like coffee or blogging or have well worded instagrams but that does not mean that she loves Jesus any less. And when a godly woman is not bound to worldly understandings of Christianity she won't be afraid when Jesus calls her to do counter-cultural things. 

The things that Jesus did on earth were completely counter-cultural for religious people during His time. Jesus could have come to earth and kept the Law perfectly and been the godliest person that the Pharisees had ever seen. But instead Jesus came and he ate with thieves and adulteresses. He wasn't concerned about people associating him with sinners for fear of "losing his witness" or whether other people thought he was a good godly man. He wasn't afraid of being counter-cultural. He was only concerned with the mission that the Father called him to and being holy and set apart in the darkness.

Women of God, this is why we keep drowning in comparison. 

We cannot continue to measure ourselves by the godliness of other people. Because measuring ourselves by any measuring stick other than Jesus is comparison and comparison is a lie that will steal our joy every single time.

We have set up the measuring stick next to other women and our ideal view of a godly woman rather than fixing our eyes on who Jesus is!

So maybe Jesus is calling you to something counter-cultural. Maybe he's asking you to dine with the tax collectors instead of the religious leaders. It might be a mission field where you are associated with unbelievers and where no one may see the good work that you are doing. Maybe instead of calling you to lead a small group, he's calling you to build a relationship with some people you know don't know Him. Maybe instead of calling you overseas He really wants you to talk to your roommate or the girl two doors down about who He is first. I'm not sure what it is for you because it looks different for everyone and that is the point. A woman of God is not a specific type of person and she is not called to one specific thing.

And do you know what that means? Women of God, you are free!  You are not bound to the box that the culture has placed you in. You do not have to fit into the category labeled "religious" in order to have a place in this world. The world labels you as a Christian based on what you do but Jesus calls you His based on who you are. You were never meant to fit into this world anyway. As Christians we are called to impact culture instead of conforming to it or creating a place for ourselves in it. Instead you are free.

You

Are

Free

Free from comparison and measuring sticks and making sure you do it right. You have one task: to be a recipient of the grace of God. And because of His grace you are compelled to love Him recklessly.

Women of God, you are not like anyone else and you don't have to be. Jesus has a purpose for you on mission with Him and with Him you are unstoppable.

So embrace your roll as a woman of the true God exactly as He has created you to be. Be real. Be genuine. Don't just be a godly woman- be the exact woman of God that the King of kings has called you to be.

"To me a lady is not frilly, flouncy, flippant, frivolous, and fluff-brained, but she is gentle, she is gracious, she is godly, and she is giving. You and I have the gift of femininity...the more womanly we are, the more manly men will be and the more God is glorified. Be women, be only women. Be real women in obedience to God." -Elizabeth Elliot

A New Season: Praying for the Harvest

Today is the first day of fall and I for one am thankful for a new season.

Don't get me wrong, summer was great. It was a sweet, refreshing season but even the sweetest of seasons leave us anticipating the next.

Earlier this year I found myself hating the fact that seasons come and go. Life seemed like a perpetual roller coaster of good seasons and then hard seasons- up and then down. And it seemed exhausting. But lately I've realized that I love the seasons. They are so consistent. A season may be hard but it doesn't last. Spring always comes.

The seasons always change.

Each season brings newness and awakening and we don't have to fear them or the change they bring. Because a woman who fears the Lord does not fear hard seasons. "When it snows she has no fear for her household; for all of them are clothed in scarlet" (proverbs 31:21). A woman of God is clothed in the scarlet blood of Jesus Christ and she has joy and hope even in the coldest of winters. 

And so I chose to joyfully enter into this new fall season, leaving behind a gloriously full summer but not fearing the chill that is coming.

Because when the seasons change, God is doing a new thing and we can literally feel it in the air.   

So now it's officially fall and that means more than boots and crunchy leaves and fall flavored lattes (although I do love those things). Fall is a season for harvest. And this fall I am praying for a great harvest. I'm praying that the seeds that have been sown in our previous seasons of sweetness or seasons of trial would bear fruit. I'm praying that we will see revival.

Jesus said that the harvest is plentiful but the workers are few (Matthew 9:37). There's a plentiful harvest out there this fall, people! So let us be the workers, the hands and feet of Jesus, who go out into the fields reaping the harvest that he has in store.

Ultimately, I'm not sure about all that this season has in store. But I do know that this new season will not last forever. It is fleeting, winter is coming, and we must make the most of it now. And above all, in this season, God will be faithful and that is more than enough.

So especially now "let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." (Galatians 6:9).

Fall is here. The harvest is ready.

Our mission fields are waiting.

transparent community

I believe that being transparent is super powerful. And it's also super rare.

Whether you've noticed yourself doing it or not, we sweep so much of who we really are under the rug and put our best foot forward even with the people closest to us.

The truth is that we are all a mess. Everyone is struggling with something. We all have hurts and heartaches and wounds from being human. Yes, Jesus walks with us and holds us together but none of us are perfect. Not even close.

But most of the time we don't share with even our closest friends how they can really be praying for us. We don't share the real hurts or struggles. Instead when someone asks we parrot off something about being overwhelmed with our schedules or nervous about a test and while those are valid things, they are not the things that the enemy is using to wage war on our hearts.

When was the last time you allowed someone into the dark places of your heart? When was the last time you told someone you struggle with jealousy, doubting God, something someone said or did to you, an eating disorder, self-image, loneliness, depression, the list goes on and on.

It can be hard and embarrassing and scary to be vulnerable and reveal to someone the ugly mess that we sweep under the rug. But something happens when we lift up the rug and the light hits the dark places. In the light, the darkness looses it's powerful grip over us. The Son brings freedom. Chains are broken.

And it gives people the courage to stop sweeping their hurt under the rug too. We can go to the hard places with each other. And that is what true community really is.

See, we are made for community. literally. We are made in the image of God. And God himself is a community: God the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. Three in one. (Genesis 1)

And so community is so much more than we think it is. It isn't just a close group of friends who have a great time together.

Community is doing life together. Real life.

It's walking through the valleys together and hiking to the mountain tops together.

It's falling on our knees together and blessing the name of the Lord when He gives and when He takes away.

But in order to live in community we have to be transparent. 

So what do you need to be transparent about and who do you need to be transparent with?

Let's not allow dark places in our community. 

Let the light flood in and overwhelm us with sweet grace.

No Longer I

"I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me." 

Galatians 2:20

Summer is over and this is my attempt to articulate what the Lord has done in me through this refreshing and refining season. It's a collection of things I've learned from the incredible community I've done life with and a deeper understanding of the (seriously-way-cooler-than-we-could-ever-imagine) Word of God, all boiled down into one little phrase my friends and I have found ourselves repeating this summer:

// NO LONGER I //

"It is now no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me" 

For so long I've been trying to live my life for Christ. I've been trying to use my life to do great things in the name of Jesus. Basically, I've been trying to live my life.  And I've been completely missing it. Here's why-

It's not about me trying to live my life for Jesus.  It's not about my life at all. 

"I have been c r u c i f i e d with Christ." 

When I said yes to Jesus, I laid my life down and my life was nailed to the cross and crucified with Jesus.

Let me repeat that.  we don't get to just nail our sin to the cross with Jesus. we have to nail our whole lives to the cross. We don't just give Jesus our sin but everything inside of us.

 Now this is HIS life. Christ lives in me. No Longer I.

And it changes everything about us.

No Longer I means that we must take up our crosses daily and crucify the wants and desires in us that aren't of Christ. No Longer I means that we are allowing Christ to live in us therefore we live holy lives worthy of the calling that we have received. No Longer I means loving people, investing in souls, praying on our knees daily, and doing hard and sometimes terrifying things. No Longer I means living in crazy and reckless abandonment of ourselves. It means adventure, spontaneity, satisfaction, joy, peace, and most of all it means LIFE.

 Because only HIS life is truly life.

No Longer I.

Does Jesus Really Satisfy?

"Praise the Lord, O my soul; 

all my inmost being, praise His holy name.

Praise the Lord, O my soul,

and forget not his benefits-

who forgives all your sins

and heals all your diseases,

who redeems your life from the pit 

and crowns you with love and compassion,

who satisfies your desires with good things."

Psalm 103:1-5

Jesus is completely and totally satisfying. This is a truth that I deeply, deeply believe in.

But I've also struggled with it and I don't think that I'm the only one.

Because the honest truth is that there have been many times in my life when I've desired other things- times when I've felt as though my relationship with Jesus hasn't been fulfilling enough. It's like I want Jesus but I also want ______ (you fill in the blank) and then my life will be great.

So I've struggled with how to reconcile this truth that I know to be real and my feelings that tell me Jesus isn't enough.

And here is what I've realized- Jesus does completely satisfy me. My soul could never long for anything more. But He did not come to satisfy my flesh and the desires of my flesh. In fact, Jesus wants to starve the desires of my flesh so that I can learn to rely solely on Him. // "You can never learn that Christ is all you need until Christ is all you have" -Corrie ten Boom 

In John 4 Jesus meets with the woman at the well. He tells the woman "everyone who drinks of this water [the well water] will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst." (John 4: 13).

I know that from this encounter with the King of kings that the woman at the well received the living water of eternal life (John 4:10) and was never thirsty again. But I would guess that the woman still had to drink water the next day, she was still physically thirsty again. Why? Because Jesus wasn't talking about satisfying her physical thirst, He was concerned with satisfying her soul.

In the same way, Jesus satisfies the desires of my heart, but he does not satisfy the desires of my flesh because they are not of Him. 

When I feel like Jesus isn't satisfying me, it is because I'm not focused on Jesus. Rather, I am focused on worldly things that are about glorifying myself and not glorifying Jesus.  Because here's the thing- It will never satisfy me to glorify myself. Why? Because we were made for the purpose of glorifying Jesus Christ and that is the most satisfying thing that I could ever do. And when we truly know who Jesus is, when we have an accurate picture of the Jesus that we serve, we literally can't help but glorify Him. Because when we discover who Jesus truly is there is no other response but to worship Him in awe and adoration.

So if Jesus isn't satisfying us enough it's only because we don't know him well enough. 

The extent to which I am satisfied in Him is the extent to which I know Him. Because the more I get to know Him, the less I thirst for other things of my flesh and of this world. The more that we get to know Jesus, the more we realize as Peter did, to whom else could we go? (John 6:68). 

So let's resolve to know Jesus more and more and more. And as we deepen our knowledge of who He is, the things of this world and the desires of our flesh will begin to fade until we can honestly say that we count it all as "loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord" (Phil 3:8).

So the question isn't "Is Jesus enough for you?" instead the question is this: Do you know Jesus enough? 

"It is a safe thing to trust Him to fulfill the desires which He creates" -Amy Carmichael 

Pursuing Holiness

I've had a lot of conversations recently with people about what it means to live radically. We desperately want to live radically for Jesus, but how do you live radically in a normal life? How do I, as a 21 year old college student, wake up everyday, go to class, go to work, spend time with my friends, and be radical for Jesus?

Well, I think the answer to the question lies in understanding what it means to pursue holiness.

God commands us to "be holy, because I am holy" (1 Peter 1:16). Just as God is holy and set apart, we are also called to be set apart because we are His people. God calls us a holy nation, a chosen generation.

We are called to be different. And not just a little different.

Radically different.

But being radically different doesn't just start with the big things like moving to another country to share the Gospel. Some of the most radical ways that we can pursue holiness are in the small choices that we make everyday, the ones that we think aren't a big deal. 

Examples of holiness and living radically are found in the details of our everyday lives.

Pursuing holiness means talking differently than the rest of the world. It means letting no unwholesome talk come out of our mouths except for what is useful for building up others (Ephesians 4:29). Why? Because we are setting ourselves apart.

Pursuing holiness looks like dressing differently than the rest of the world. It means dressing modestly and not continuously pushing the limits. Why? Because it sets us apart. (Do we, women of God, truly dress more modestly than the rest of the world? Could you pick us out as different, say, on a beach? Or do we only measure the length of our shorts and pull out our one pieces and tankinis in time for church camp?)

Pursuing holiness also means being sensitive to what we are watching and listening to and reading. Why? Because we truly want whatever we think about to be lovely and praiseworthy (Phil 4:8) so that we can know Jesus more.

It's all of those things and so much more.

Pursuing holiness and having a radical faith isn't just taking the Gospel to the ends of the earth or facing persecution in the name of Jesus (though that is certainly radical!) But having a radical faith is looking radically different from the rest of the world in the name of Jesus by striving everyday, in our everyday choices, to become more like Jesus. This is what pursuing holiness is- it's hating the sin in our lives that keeps us from knowing Jesus more and pursuing Him! Pursuing holiness is how we pursue Jesus!

But somewhere along the way, we've forgotten about this. Rarely anymore does our generation talk about pursuing holiness. We almost seem to fear pursuing holiness. We don't want to seem "holier than thou" in our attitude. We don't want to offend people, especially other Christians. It seems as though we've pushed the pursuit of holiness to the side because of a fear of legalism.

But pursuing holiness isn't legalistic because our true pursuit of holiness reminds us daily how much we need grace. And thank the Lord we have the grace we desperately need to continue pursuing Jesus and pursuing holiness every time we fail. Because we will fail. A lot. But that's the Gospel.

And we share the Gospel with our actions when we are set apart from the world. When we are different people start asking questions. No one will believe that the Gospel has the power to change lives if your life looks the same as theirs. The Gospel is radical. And the Gospel in you makes you radical.

So don't buy into the lie that we have to fit into the world in order to share the Gospel with the world. The enemy loves that lie. We are aliens! We are ambassadors! We are called to love the people of this world but we aren't loving anyone if we aren't showing them a Gospel that is life changing. The Gospel is offensive. Living radically and pursuing holiness is offensive. And sometimes it will even offend other believers. But we cannot fear offending people with living out the Gospel in a radical and holy lifestyle or we will miss out on the abundant life Jesus has for us. Loving the world means taking a stand against sin, especially the sin in our own lives.

So what are you willing to risk to have a radical faith?

Let's take up our crosses and pursue holiness everyday so that we can know Jesus more and more and more and more. He is so worth it.

so tired of me

I am so tired of me.

Not in the I-hate-myself way but more in the I-am-so-tired-of-my-life-being-all-about-me way.

And no, I don't mean this in a super spiritual way. I just mean that I am genuinely tired of dealing with my own problems, my own hurts, and my own issues. They are stealing my joy and I am tired of giving them all of my time and attention.

See, it's a pretty common theme in our culture today to believe that college is all about you.

It's all about your time to find out who you are. Decide who you want to be. Focus on yourself. Be selfish. Make mistakes. And ultimately, do what you want.

Well, I don't know about ya'll, but this isn't working out well for me. The more I focus on myself, the more I realize what a mess I am. The more that I try to put my life together exactly how I want it, the more frustrated I become.

And so I wake up everyday and live my life as if it revolves around me. I talk about me. I think about me. Yep, it's pretty much all about me.

And here is the worst part: We make Jesus about us too.

I might as well be asking Jesus what he can do for me. Jesus can you put my life together perfectly? If I follow you then will you tell me exactly what to do in order to have the best life? 

Don't get me wrong here! Yes, of course we should bring all of our problems to the feet of Jesus, but not so that he can fix them- so that he can give us peace! And yes, of course we should follow Jesus and seek His will but not so that he will lead us down the path of happiness with the least amount of hurt and trials. Sometimes following Jesus leads to death. And all of the time the path of Jesus will involve persecution. ("In fact, everyone who wants to live a godly life in Christ Jesus WILL be persecuted" 2Timothy 3:12)

So think about this next time you ask God to reveal his will and perfect plan for your life- ask him because you know it will be the most abundant and fulfilling life and not the easiest, not the tame Christian lifestyle that goes to church on Sunday and prays for God to fix their problems. "Then Jesus said to His disciples, 'If anyone wishes to come after Me, he must deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me. For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it; but whoever loses his life for My sake will find it.'"Matthew 16:24-25 Why in the world have we not been taking Jesus's words seriously about this?

Because here is something shocking to our culture- the Gospel is not about you. It is about Jesus. And Jesus did not die on that cross and rise from the grave so that he could fix my earthly problems! He defeated death so that he could free me from my sin!

So what's the cure? How do I stop acting like everything is about me? How do I stop acting like the Gospel is about me?

Share it.

Share the Gospel with your words. Share it with your actions. DO SOMETHING for someone else in the name of Jesus Christ.

Because let me tell you this, when you stop paying attention to your self and your own problems and you start focusing on how God wants to use you to impact others with the power of the Gospel, then your issues will seem insignificant.

Something I am learning is this: Life is better when it's not about me. It's so much more fun and exciting and kind of actually really scary to give your entire life to Jesus and to sharing his Gospel of love and grace with others. Because guess what? It isn't about you anymore. That means that you don't have to worry about all of your problems anymore. Let me say that again, you can stop worrying about figuring out all of your problems and issues and struggles! What a relief! You are FREE! Free to live life abundantly by abandoning your worldly cares and sharing freedom with others! How beautiful.

It is scary because it isn't going to be easy but you get to live for something more than just yourself! It doesn't have to be all about you anymore! Life would be so disappointing if it was only about us and seeking our own happiness. But good news! There is something more to live and to die for!
And YOU get to be a part of it!

So when you realize that you are starting to get sad and anxious and frustrated- stop paying so much attention to yourself. There is a grander picture being painted- one of victory and freedom and grace and love and redemption. And that, my friend, is exciting.

So, if you're tired of yourself- of your life being all about you- then ask Jesus to open your eyes to see beyond yourself. But here's a warning- life might get a little crazy.

Grace Again

Few times in my life have I heard the voice of the Lord as clearly as I did sitting in the middle of class yesterday.

It came out of the middle of a muddle of thoughts that have been running through my heart lately. Such sweet grace and relief that I literally almost starting crying in class. Which was a funny sight, let me assure you...

Taylor, daughter, when I called you I knew you would make mistakes. 

My heart literally sang to be reminded of such a simple truth

When Jesus called you to be on mission with Him, he knew you would make mistakes. And not just little mistakes, but big mistakes.

And yet He still called you.

So take a deep breath. It's okay! Just because you surprised yourself, does not mean that you surprised God. You have not ruined it all.

Only in foolishness would I allow myself to believe that I must be perfect to serve Jesus. Or that God expects me to be perfect in order to serve Him well. Hello! That is why GRACE exists!

God doesn't say to me- Taylor, if you are good enough I will use you. And if you make a mistake I will stop using you. Praise God that He does not say that to us!

Don't get me wrong. God calls us to be holy and to diligently pursue holiness. But the closer we get to holiness, the more deeply we will feel the disgust of our sin. And we cannot allow it to paralyze us! That is why we have to learn how to accept grace.

When I choose to remain frustrated by my own failures and mistakes rather than accepting the grace that Jesus is extending to me, I am not practicing humility. Instead I'm just letting my pride get in the way. 

So humble yourself before the Lord- acknowledge your need for grace and accept it with joy! And He will lift you up- up out of that pit of failure and confusion that your mistakes have tossed you in.

"Humble yourselves before the Lord, and He will lift you up." James 4:10 

2014

I've been trying to come up with a New Years resolution all day long and it hasn't been going well. 

My list so far goes like this...

In 2014:

I will learn new things about Jesus. 

I will drink excessive amounts of coffee while sharing life with sweet friends, rushing to 8a.m.s, studying for exams, and reading the Word from my precious Savior.

I will stop hoping in my own plans and start hoping in the Lord and His promises to me

I will tell extremely cheesy jokes and laugh at them myself.

I will learn to understand grace more deeply by giving it and acknowledging my need to accept it.

I'll take more pictures and cherish precious moments with the people that I love.

I will memorize more scripture

I'll drink too much diet coke and say yes to way too many McFlurry runs with my friends

I will read more books and seek more wisdom

I will pray longer and harder

And I will dream B I G G E R

See- it's a great list. And if I do all of those things, I know I'll be a better person for it (except for maybe the McFlurry part).

But what I really want in 2014 is to see God move in my life in a way that I never have before.

So what kind of resolutions do you make to meet a goal like that? Well honestly, I don't think it will be the kind that starts with "I will..." because if I truly desire for God to move in my life this year, then I believe that it will all boil down to one thing: in 2014, it won't be about me.

It wont be about me eating healthier, learning more, reading more, or going more places- it won't be about me at all.

2014 must be about all that GOD WILL DO and not all that I will do. 

Don't get me wrong, I am still going to try to do all of the things on that list. But my focus cannot be on myself but rather on glorifying Jesus through the things that I do.

So this year, if we want to see God move in incredible ways among us, let's stop resolving to do things to make ourselves better and start focusing on glorifying God for all that He will do.

He must become greater; I must become less. John 3:30

2014 is going to be a great adventure.

be broken

Sometimes the truth and the depth of the Gospel hits you again like a brick. 

This happened to me yesterday as I read the beginning of Jeremiah. I'll be honest- I began my time in the Word pretty begrudgingly. I was feeling empty and I didn't think there was anything God could say to soften my heart that day...

I'm so glad that I was wrong. 

I don't have much to say about it, but I wanted to share these words from God today because maybe someone is feeling the same way that I was yesterday. 

I love how it works. First, I read Jeremiah 2. 

Jeremiah 2:

"But my people have exchanged their glorious God 
   for worthless idols...

They have forsaken me,
    the spring of living water,
and have dug their own cisterns,
    broken cisterns that cannot hold water...

You said, It’s no use!
    I love foreign gods,
    and I must go after them...

My people have forgotten me,
    days without number.
³³ How skilled you are at pursuing love!...

Yet in spite of all this
³⁵     you say, I am innocent;
    he is not angry with me.


Yep that's me. 

Trying to hold my own water in a broken cistern instead of going to the spring of life.

I pursue love elsewhere. 

I have exchanged the glory of God for worthless idols. 

But then- in the very next chapter I hear the grace that I do not deserve. Read this! 

Jeremiah 3:

Return, faithless Israel, declares the Lord,
    I will frown on you no longer,
for I am faithful,’ declares the Lord,
    I will not be angry forever...

Return, faithless people, declares the Lord, for I am your husband. I will choose you...

How gladly would I treat you like my children
    and give you a pleasant land,
    the most beautiful inheritance of any nation.’
I thought you would call me ‘Father’
    and not turn away from following me.

That is GRACE people. And it's overwhelming! 

I do not deserve His love and faithfulness. But He gives it to me anyway. 

He asks me to call Him F A T H E R . 

He CHOOSES me despite my faithlessness.

So cherish His grace today. Let it sweetly break your heart.

you're not good enough

The enemy has gotten a lie stuck in my head

A lie that seems to be chasing me around every corner lately

A lie that steals my joy and cripples my ability to pursue my dreams

A lie that most of the time I'm not quite sure is a lie

"I'm not good enough"

It repeats itself in my head regularly. Every mistake. Every choice. Everyday.

And I fight and I fight and I fight to prove Satan wrong.

"I am good enough!" I tell myself.

I work harder. I try harder. I struggle longer.

And yet.. I continue to  F A I L . 

But I've finally realized that it isn't a lie

I'm not good enough. What a relief. I'm not good enough

The culture keeps telling me to believe in myself. Be confident in who I am. And never let anyone tell me that I'm not good enough 

But our culture is wrong again. Is anyone really surprised by that? 

I'm not good enough 

I need Jesus. 

I need G R A C E .

Praise God for He is good enough. And He loves me regardless of my mess

But when I tell myself over and over again that I am good enough, I ignore my need for grace and my need for Jesus

I keep finding my worth in how much I love Jesus and not how much He loves me

I keep finding my value in how much I do for the Kingdom instead of how much Jesus did for me

And finally here I am. Learning that God will not let us ignore grace for long. 

Eventually we will all realize how desperately we need it. 

My worth cannot come from how good I am. It cannot come from how much I love Jesus, how much spiritual fruit I bear,or how many things in my life I get right according to what we learn in church. 

And I cannot keep trying to earn the favor of God or man by being good enough. 

Because it's not going to happen and because God has already given me good things and will continue to work for my good regardless of how good I am. 

Because grace isn't just about not getting what we deserve, it's about getting what we don't deserve. 

If I was good enough, I would deserve it. 

But I'm not and I don't and that is what makes it grace. 

So find freedom in admitting that you aren't good enough and you never will be.  

And then find joy in the good news:

Because you aren't good enough, you don't deserve anything but God loves you anyway. He wants to save you from the sin that makes you feel empty and He wants to have a relationship with you and  bless you with good things. 

That's grace people.

So glorify God because He deserves all of the praise. 

The Still Small Voice

I don't always do the things that God asks me to do. And I think that can probably be said for just about every Christian ever...ever.

And sometimes I just ignore what I know am supposed to do but I also think a lot of the time, it's because I talk talk myself out of it with a very crafty question from Satan that he's been asking since the Garden of Eden: "Did God really say you must not eat from any tree in the garden?"(Gen 3:1)

Did God really say that? 

Did He really?

Sometimes we hear the voice of the Holy Spirit asking us to do something we may think seems crazy or scary or even just uncomfortable. And instead of doing it- we ask the question "Did God really say that?" 

So many of us struggle with what God wants us to do. It's what I've been struggling with since I graduated high school. What does He want me to do after school? Where does He want to use me? What is the answer in this situation? Sometimes I think that if He would just write it out for me, I'd happily do it. I just want to know!

But that's just not how we hear from Him usually and instead when we hear the still small voice of the Holy Spirit, we don't know how to discern it from our own voice or the voices of the enemy and it keeps us from doing the greatest things that God's calling us to. 

So what's the solution?

I've been begging God for an answer and I feel like I've finally gotten one. It's surprisingly simple. 

Knowing His voice. 

Easier said than done, right?

But we cannot do all of the specific things that the Lord is calling us to until we learn to discern His voice. 

"His sheep follow him because they know his voice." John 10:4

We have to be in tune with the voice of the Holy Spirit. Plain and simple. 

So how?

Well, that question is a little more complicated but this I know to be true: 

When you seek the Lord, you find Him. (Matt. 7:7)

Seek His voice so often that you know it.

Stop asking God to write it in the skies for you and instead learn to listen. 

Seek His voice diligently.

Then see the crazy adventures He will take you on when are obedient to His voice. 

wishful praying

When I was little I used to wish on my birthday candles that my aunt would accept Jesus in her heart. When I was 12 she did. But it wasn’t because I wished on my birthday candles; it was because my mom, my family, and myself prayed relentlessly for her salvation.

When I was little I didn’t quite know the difference between a wish and a prayer and the truth is that I think it’s a more common mistake then you may think.

Do you ever feel like the prayers you breathe to God are more like a wish and less like a powerful promise that you can put your faith in? I do.

I don’t bank on them- because I’m not sure that they can be trusted. The honest truth is that a lot of times I don’t have faith in them. They’re just a wish list. And I’m left crossing my fingers and worrying about them all day.

But this isn’t the way it is supposed to be. Prayer is supposed to be powerful. My prayers are rooted in promises straight from the God of the Universe. I can expect that the Lord will honor my prayers prayed in faith and in confidence. And I can praise Him and rest in peace because I know that He will be faithful.

The dreams that the Lord has laid on my heart aren’t simply wishful thinking. They may seem crazy. They may seem foolish or illogical or impossible. But I don’t have to resign them to childish wishes that only happen in fairy tales. Disney says “a dream is a wish that your heart makes.” But I know that’s wrong. A dream is prayer that God lays on your heart- meant to be prayed with confidence and pursued in a way that glorifies the Lord who made you.

This summer God is teaching me a lot about prayer. And I think that I'm just touching on the tip of the iceberg! But I know this, if I learn how to pray in confidence and with expectation- it changes everything.

So don’t turn your prayers into wishes. And don’t dream on shooting stars.

Pray and dream with confidence that the Lord will come through.

“Dear friends, if our hearts do not condemn us, we have confidence before God” 

I John 3:21

“Who you become is determined by how you pray” – Mark Batterson, The Circle Maker 

one for the books

“I will still be confident in this, I will see the goodness of the Lord.

Be strong, take heart and wait for the Lord.”

Psalm 27:13-14

 An interesting thing I’ve noticed about God is this: Sometimes it’s hard to notice His faithfulness in the moment but when you look back, the evidence of it is ALWAYS there so plainly.

 That’s why when things come to end, such as my sophomore year in college, I think it’s important to reflect on all that the Lord has done.

 This second year of college has been incredible. I treasure the meaningful relationships I’ve been given with people who invest in me as I invest in them. The Lord has blessed me with a community of people that have taught me how to love well. He has given me lessons on joy and contentment and living intentionally.

 And the coolest part is that He has ended my year with the same lesson that it began with- a simple one, but one that can radically change your perspective when you learn to walk in it’s truth.

 God is good. He is ALWAYS good.

 Whether we see it in our immediate circumstances or not, He is still good.

 This year, I’ve seen the goodness of God and I’m blown away by His faithfulness.

 And when hard times come, because they surely will, I can look back and know that the Lord will be faithful once more.

 This year has been quite a journey. I’ve been uplifted, overjoyed, broken, loved, encouraged, disheartened, overwhelmed, and invested in. I’ve laughed till I can’t breathe, I’ve cried with my friends when our lives have gotten hard, and I’ve screamed Taylor Swift songs in the car on the way home from Sonic happy hour. I’ve held hands with people who love me and prayed for good test grades, hard decisions, broken relationships, and healing.

  And I’ll be driving home with a heart overflowing with joy.

 Never could I have imagined such a wonderful year as I drove to school in August,

 But that’s the best thing about God’s goodness and faithfulness- it’s always so much better than I could ever hope for.

 “Be at rest once more, O my soul, for the Lord has been good to you.” Psalm 116:7